archy

Pete’s horrible revenge
Thursday, a bunch of second-rate movement conservatives got together to hold a special testimonial dinner for Tom DeLay (R - Badhair, Texas). The goal was to show us liberals how wide the support for Tom is. In that spirit, almost two-dozen of the House's more than 220 Republicans showed up. Among the speakers was Phyllis Schlafly, who is affectionately known as "the great, great, great grandmother of the conservative movement." Red meat was served, as was a cake decorated with little chocolate hammers. During dessert, a renegade bluegrass band performed a modified version of the sixties anthem, "If I Had a Hammer."

I'm a pacifist and an opponent of the death penalty, as is, I believe, the author of "If I Had a Hammer," Pete Seeger. Nevertheless, I would be remiss if I did not point out that the Levitical law so beloved to the religious right gives Seeger the right to kill both the band and DeLay. Not that I think he should; I just wanted to point that out.