The stupid files

"We will never have the elite, smart people on our side." Ex-sen. Rick Santorum 9/15/12 

"We've got to stop being the stupid party." Gov. Bobby Jindal, LA 1/25/13

At this point in the political cycle, whenever a Republican or high-profile conservative says something stupid or offensive, we often find ourselves thinking, "I hope someone is saving this for the election." At least I think that. I've decided to take up part of that burden. I welcome your contributions.

This is how I'm defining my file: I'm collecting quotes of Republicans sayings thing that are stupid in the sense that Bobby Jindal meant. Let's parse that.

By "quote," I mean it must be an exact quote that anyone can understand, not a paraphrase or a summary. Soundbites are the best. This is problem with some people. Louie Gohmert is a treasure chest of stupidity, but his best works are hidden in long rambling statements of twisted logic that end with bestiality. Every quote needs to be documented by a link to a news source, not a Facebook meme.

By "Republicans," I mean actual office holding Republicans (federal, state, or local offices all count), GOP party officials (again, at any level), and high-profile former office holders. I do not want conservative pundits, talk radio hosts, televangelists, or Fox News personalities. Right Wing Watch does a good enough job of documenting those. Naturally, those who are up for reelection next year are highly desirable, but, if I keep doing this, the real value of the project will come in three and five years when governors and senators who thought they had left this stuff far in the past come up for reelection.

This brings us to "stupid." What I do not mean by stupid are positions that are just plain wrong, or that will get Democrats and liberals fired up. I want actually stupid: scientifically, logically, or politically stupid. Ignorant statements about history or geography are good. Paranoid conspiracy mongering is also good. Anti-intellectualism is nice. I want things that independents, some kinds of libertarians, or even non-teaparty Republicans will be turned off by. Denying global warming is wrong; saying wind farms will use up all the wind and make the world hotter is stupid. Being against legal abortion is wrong; saying the body has a way to shut that down is stupid. Thinking Africa is a country or not knowing Libya is in Africa are both stupid. Overt racism and sexism are stupid; policies that have racist or sexist implications are not. Opposing a citizenship path for undocumented immigrants is wrong; saying such a path will force people who do not want to be citizens to become citizens against their will is stupid. Extra points will be awarded for scientific stupidity by members of the two congressional science committees.

Send me your nominations. I'll put up a list of inductees every month. You can put your nominations in the comments here, send them to archymarquis at aol dot com, or message them to me on  Twitter (@archymck).

Meanwhile: Some folks need to take up some of the other categories of outrageousness in the GOP and the right in general. Rudeness by Republicans (Obama is Hitler), paranoia from Republicans (he's coming to our guns and Bibles), violent rhetoric from the right in general (calls for a violent revolution, hints of assassination, threats of street-thuggery), these all need trackers and, since these aren't just oppo research, these need to be researched further back.

More conservatives behaving badly

Aside from Sen. Shelby's (R-AL) disgusing obstruction and partisanship, the last twentyfor hours have had a bumper crop of conservatives behaving badly.

Nashville
Let's start with the Tea Party convention. Despite heavy criticism from within and without the movement, the high ticket and astroturfed convention opened last night. Tom Tancredo, the vociferousy anti-immigrant former congressman and failed presidential candidate opened the show with a call to return to one of the pillars of Jim Crow.

Because we do not have a civics literacy test before people can vote in this country. People who cannot even spell the word "vote," or say it in English put a committed socialist ideologue in the White House. Name is Barack Hussein Obama.

Of course, if Tancredo had a modicum of civics literacy, he would understand the racist history of literacy poll testing. Maybe he does know it and doesn't care. He also seeems blissfully unaware of the fact that as you go up the scale of edication, voters become more liberal. Among the Teabaggers, this idea was recieved with loud applause.

This morning, the general sessions opened without flags, without an opening prayer, and with the Pledge of Allegiance.

Anywhere but Wasilla
Sarah Palin is dealing with criticism for taking over $100,000 to speak at the Tea Party convention by saying she will donate the money to her PAC. What is the PAC going to do with the money? They are going to buy thousands of copies of Palin's book, thus laundering part of the money and returning it to her. This little ploy also makes sure she stays at the top of the best-seller list and looks influential as she plans her future political career.

Washington, DC
After denouncing stimulus funds as "fiscal child abuse," warning that the funds would lead to "a thing called slavery," and trying to get his state to refuse the funds, Gov. Mark Sanford (R) of South Carolina is in Washington demanding more funds.

His Mom and Dad's basement
ACORN stalker and accused phone tapper, James O'Keefe, Has an extensive history of race baiting and pallin' around with white supremists. Now that has come to light, his supporters are running for cover and making excuses (it's a conspiracy by the liberal media elite).

Washington, again
Rep. Paul Ryan (R-WI), the ranking member on the House Budget Committee just released a budget plan that is probably a rough draft of the counter budget the Republican Party will release next month. The plan calls for big cuts in Social Security and privatizing what's left. It calls for the phase out of Medicare. It fails to balance the budget in his lifetime.

Baton Rouge
It's been over a year since I demanded Bobby Jindal produce proof of his citizenship. He still maintains a studied and guilty silence.

It's been a target rich environment this week and I'm sure you have your own favorites to add. Go for it.

Jindal birth certificate watch - day 217

More than seven months have passed since I asked Bobby Jindal to come clean with the American people and show us the real, authentic, notarized, vault copy of his birth certificate. It's a simple request. He has the power to end the rumors and speculation (by other people, not me) that swirl around this issue. Why is avoiding the issue? what does he have to hide? Why is he hiding it and where has he hid it? Since I exposed this sordid mystery, Dom DeLuise, Michael Jackson, Oscar Mayer (yes, that Oscar Mayer), Sybil (the Prime Minister's cat), and the number three guy in the Taliban have all died. How many more bodies must pile up on the Jindal death list before we know the truth?

If you care about truth, justice, and apple pie, send me lots of money so I can continue my hard hitting investigative work and stay one step ahead of the Illuminati assassins who want to make sure that the truth never gets out.

Jindal birth certificate watch - day 77

Eleven weeks have passed since I raised the question of Bobby Jindal's citizenship. Jindal admits to having been conceived in a foreign country by foreigners. Why does the MSM refuse to look into this? If Jindal has nothing to hide, why won't he address my perfectly legitimate concerns about his citizenship? His handlers still refuse to give us the state's original copy of his birth certificate to subject to exhaustive font and kerning examination? Their silence has gone beyond damning and is now damned damning. The American people wait, but their patience is not unlimited.

Jindal birth certificate watch - day 5

The mainstream media is either too afraid or too corrupt to touch this story. It's up to the amazing power of citizen journalism to see that this doesn't disappear down the memory hole.

Jindal birth certificate watch - day 3

The Jindal people still haven't addressed my perfectly legitimate concerns about his citizenship. Their silence is damning.

The Jindal question

This morning I got up and started a brilliant post on all aspects of Bobby Jindal's speech, but then I had to take Clever Wife to a doctor appointment and, by the time I got back, people with much better traffic than I have had stolen all of my good points. However, no one asked the most important question about this man who wants to be president: How come he has never shown us his birth certificate? He admits to being conceived in a foreign country by foreigners. If he has nothing to hide, why hasn't he given us the state's original copy of his birth certificate and allowed us to subject it to exhaustive font and kerning examination? The American people deserve answers.