I think this week I'll get all my news from The Onion.
God Puts His Tool Back Into Office
Kerry Takes Frustration Out On Lobster
America Comes Out Agin The Gay Marryin'
Bush Does Victory Lap Around World Trade Center Site
MoveOn CurlsUp InCorner
Poll: Youth Totally Meant To Vote In Record Numbers
Despite Republican Victory, Bush Supporter Has Tiny, Tiny Penis
U.S. Inspires World With Attempt At Democratic Election
Next week (technically, at brunch on Sunday), when the battle begins anew, I'll start reading other news. Until then, this all I can handle.
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